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Helen Diller Family Compr Cancer Ctr
Word & Image: Summer 2002

[image] Cancer is a mountain
The woman is at the top
Reaching up with all she has
Stretching out all she has been through.
Opening her heart to receive.
The mountain top air is crisp, and clear,
  and clean.
She breathes it in and her body, mind,
  and soul feel fresh and renewed.
Surrounded by the Warmth of the Sun,
  that holds, and caresses her tenderly.
Kissing her face, and body, with
  healing warmth, and giving her
  mighty strength, and power.

She is Free!

| G.F.N., 1996 |

[image]

[image] The Mandala
What is a Mandala? It is a creative art symbol of yourself. It is ever evolving just as the universe is constantly changing. The mandala is the result of the development of an inner readiness to accept the archetype of the Self. It is necessary to clear away projections of our unconscious thoughts. With insight into our projects a deep moral change comes about and we focus on a new goal in our life. The entire personality is renewed. As life progresses and the increase of consciousness is achieved, the inner conflicts awaken and the problem of reconciling the oppositions they reveal has to be taken as a serious urgent task. Working on the mandala of my life is a ceaseless meditative activity as I make new discoveries about myself. Each new discovery creates a new mandala of myself.   | Barbara Mandler, 1997 |

        [image]         [image]

The Veil of Illusion
The night time is brutal,
there is no "snuggling in"
All of the aches and pains and horrors
come to haunt me.

In the deep dark stillness of the night
I am left with my self,
A loneliness I can't describe
Nothing seems real

Even the light of a beautiful day
can't diminish the darkness
The hustle bustle of Saturday morning sounds
can't break the silence, the stillness.

But once in a while
in a blissful moment of distraction
I can almost remember the other side
when I still wore the veil.

| Z, breast cancer |

Sitting on top of the World.

I knew who I was -- love, control, joy, family, goals,
work I adored, confidence.

Each day lived,
Each day precious,
Each day embraced,

Then diagnosis.

Deep Deep Depression. No more control. No
more joy. No more self, only Fear, only Anger,
only Monsters, only Vulnerability. Body parts that I
loved, appreciated and knew so well, taken away.

How could I get back the self I counted on?

Grasping.

I am returning
I have more, I have less, I have fear, I have me.
Did I ever have anything but this moment?
Dancing a little slower now,

Sitting on top of the World.

| C.B.B., 2/1/96 |

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About the Artwork
Each image above links to a larger view. Works of poetry and artwork were created independently by individual patients unless otherwise stated. Names are withheld in some cases to protect the privacy of the individual. Initials, diagnoses, ages, and titles of artworks are used with permission. These works, which are not for sale, remain in the Art for Recovery collections at UCSF. Artwork, poetry, and statements may not be reprinted without permission.

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